Something doesn't feel right. I'm bothered. I'm so tired of this discussion. Here's why: I'm a Christian...not that being a Christian is my problem, actually quite the opposite...but, rather that being lumped in with the "Christian" community is, as of late, a HUGE problem. At this point, my specific dilemma is the gay marriage debate.
Here's the picture...marriage is a BIG deal to me. I am, in fact, notoriously outspoken on the subject, have paid high prices in defense of it, and willingly put the majority of my energies in life into making mine extraordinary. I'm kind of a marriage freak...I think it's worth caring alot about. However, while I'm watching Miss California on the Today show, as a new spokesperson for The Institute of Marriage, my skin is crawling. Every time she says, "Matt, I'm just trying to protect marriage", I feel like someone is putting a cattle prod in my side. First of all, she is not married...never has been...she's 22. Secondly, her parents are in the middle of a divorce that is rumored to be nasty. So, it gives me pause to hear her say that she was taught her whole life that marriage was between a man and a woman, and that's how it should stay....I mean, could we cling a little tighter to an ideal that clearly wasn't worth putting into practice for the two people that were her teachers on the matter? That's just it...roughly 50-60 percent of marriages end up in divorce. Sadly, that number is even higher in the Christian community. So, here's the mental picture in my head...an army of religious groups, all standing at the gate of a city named Marriage...tanks at the ready, guns blazing, organized ranks, war rhetoric...and behind the gate, the city lies in rubble. What exactly are we protecting? I think it's possible we have a pretty serious speck vs. plank situation here, folks.
I'm not sure I understand why the homosexuality thing became the pet of religious hypocrites on a global scale, but I think I'm going to go out on a Christian limb, here, and assert a different thought process. Samaritans, lepers, tax collectors, prostitutes...these were the pet whipping post groups of religious zealots in Bible times. They were looked on as less than, they were outcasts, and they were treated much the same as homosexuals are treated by the church, today. However, when Jesus came on the scene, these were the people He chose to be around, to break bread with, to heal, to love, to touch...to reach out to. Of all the accounts of Jesus time here on earth, you never see him act any way but lovingly toward these outcasts. His disdain for the law-happy religious leaders, who always did everything "right", however, is palpable. I've actually heard it said that God hates homosexuality. Ahem...the only sins that the Bible states that God hates, are sins of the heart...sins that involve hypocrisy and judgmentalism. I'm so tired of this conversation! I'm sure that there are my "Christian" friends who may be reading this, that are all too excited to point my attentions toward the book of Leviticus, and other passages from the Bible. My response is this...why, then are we not feeling the need to enforce the law that stated that women are not to be allowed to go to church if they are on their menstrual cycle...in fact, they aren't allowed to eat with anyone else, because they are dirty. Well, that might just throw a kink into our society as a whole, now wouldn't it? Why are we not addressing the pain that accompanies people to their demise? Why are we not being the body of Christ? He is NOWHERE in this debate...stop using His name!!!!!! Call it what it really is...a manipulation for conservativism...but, it's NOT JESUS!!!!
So, does gay marriage threaten the sanctity of traditional marriage? Not mine. It doesn't offend my sensabilities about marriage because Ellen and Portia got married. It doesn't offend my sensabilities about marriage that Melissa Etheridge and her wife are legally bound to one another....it just doesn't. There I've said it...it feels so good to come out of the closet! I'm not offended by gay marriage...whew! I tell you what I am offended by...my friend that walked out on her husband, because she didn't feel like trying...no counseling, no effort, no regard for their child. I'm offended by the countless times I've been called to friends houses to run interference against their marital spats and witnessing a physical altercation or two....the people that I know that lead a double life apart from their spouse and their children, and the couples I know who lead completely separate lives, because they have no idea how to be married and so they just co-exist. These situations are even more threatening to the sanctity of traditional marriage, because they are all Christians. These are people to whom love is supposed to come easiest, yet, they are so busy being completely judgmental and self-consumed that they decided not to do the work. I'm not saying it's easy...Lord knows it's not. Thankfully, my own marriage grows every time I go and see these situations and realize just how grateful I am for the man I spend my life with. What I am saying is that maybe the Christian community should work on cleaning up their own cesspool of a situation before we go kicking the doors down in voting booths from here on out. Besides, isn't this the same group of people who throw their heads back and howl about separation of church and state, and religious freedoms if anyone messes with their rights, but isn't willing to NOT be the fly in the oinment for anyone else? Double standards anyone?
On a personal note...there was a time in my life that I was dealing with a shattered foundation...the kind that makes you question every moment of your life previous to that incident...the kind that I still suffer aftershocks from, to this day. I went in search of comfort and love...I needed spiritual TLC for the first time in my life. I looked for it in the youth group I grew up in...and I was spurned. Guess where I found the love of Jesus I was so desparately needing to be reminded of?..from a couple of gay friends. I went to their church to play my flute for a celebration concert they were having, and had one of the most profound and healing experiences with God that I had ever had. The result for me was a dichotomy...a separation between what I was told I was to stand for, and what I realized was the truth when the hour of need came upon me. I learned from that moment forward to always look for myself if I wanted an answer I could depend on. I look in the gospels to hear what Jesus has to say about things, and usually, I see that what was told to me most of my life, is not really what He said at all...and certainly not what He stands for. The emphasis that is placed on gay people as a threat to our society as a whole is tiresome. I'm sick to death of it! Why aren't there marches on me and my family for being obese? I mean, isn't that a threat to society as a whole...aren't we the very picture of sickness and disease and gluttony and sloth? Why aren't there marches on straight people who cheat on their spouse? Isn't that a threat to the sanctity of traditional marriage? What about a march on preachers who say ridiculous things on television that have nothing to do with God, but rather their own inability to explain away tragedy? Aren't they doing an immeasurable damage to the kingdom of God? Who in the name of God, is finally going to put a stop to this? You would think that what Jesus did in giving His life so that the crucifixion of our souls would end with Him would have been enough...clearly it's not enough for some...but, thank You LORD!...it's more than enough for me!!! I love you to all my gay friends, my fat friends, my alcoholic friends, my proud friends, my liar friends, my insecure friends...my human friends...He loves us ALL!
Disclaimer: if there is a religious organization that would like to revoke my card...please, by all means...TAKE IT! I never applied for it, I never activated it, and I certainly will never use it...thanks anyway, but Jesus is all I will be needing for this lifetime. Please take me off your call list, thanks.
